I told you so

I just happened to see this article on my MSN home page today,

http://www.slate.com/id/2193879/?GT1=38001

I rest my case.

Bags, Bags and more Bags

Here's a couple cool things that cool people are doing.

Bags for Darfur - this lady makes handbags out of recycled fabrics (mostly purchased from thrift stores, etc.) and all the proceeds go to supprt the effort to provde shelter and aid to the people of Darfur.

My friend Leah's sister Jennie is making Bags for Zaza. Zaza is a little girl that a couple in Florida wants to adopt (they call her Zaza because we don't know who she is yet). Jennie isn't buying any new fabric, she is using stuff that has been piling up in her house over the years. Since she is spending $0 on buying new material, all of her proceeds can go towards the family waiting to bring Zaza home.

All of these bags are incredible. There have been many on the site that I have wanted to buy but never got around to actually doing it. Alas, now these bags are being worn by different women around the country.

I think these are really cool efforts. Go check 'em out.

Phobo-mania

I hate bugs. I mean, really really hate them. I wish it were funny, but to me it's not, it's just disturbing. I've never been much of a girly-girl but bugs...I can't do bugs.

It's not all bugs really, I can handle most of them, most of them time. I mean I never like them crawling on me and get really freaked out if I find them in my room or, worse, in my bed **shudder** but I can usually handle them.

Manitoba has a few species of bugs that I cannot handle. I have a paralyzing fear of wood ticks and get the MAJOR heebie-jeebies around cankerworms. These are bugs that I did not know about prior to moving to this horrid province (Note: I know I recently said that Manitoba was home but a)I really only like it from September to October when there are neither bugs nor frigid temperatures; and b) it's the people who make it feel like home...I actually care very little for the province itself). I was not aware that Alberta had ticks or cankerworms although my parents assure me they were there. Ticks are apparently in Indian Battle Park but we never went down there during their season. And there must have been cankerworms because my parents say that I am just like my grandma...if there are worms hanging off the trees she doesn't go outside.

Wood ticks are impossible to kill and burrow their tiny little heads into your skin and suck your blood until they are fat and red. **shhhhuuuudddder** They hide in inconspicous places like behind ears, in your hair and in your nether-regions. People try to tell me that they only live in long grasses out in the countryside. They lie. True, I have never seen one in the city but my friend said he got one from the field across from our house and that's enough for me. I stick to the pavement.

Wood tick season is generally from May to June and as if that's not bad enough, in June the cankerworms come out. They spend all spring eating the leaves of all the trees and when they are nice and full they rappel from the trees from thin strings. So you're walking along and all of the sudden you are surrounded by these little green worms hanging off of the trees. **shhhhuuuudddder**

So you see, neither the grass nor the pavement is safe from disgusting bugs.

Last night I was at a barbeque and I found it impossible to enjoy myself. I was tense the entire time. You see, this yard was well shaded by trees. Cankerworm trees. I could see them hanging down just waiting to land on me. What's worse is that every so often you would think that you felt teeny tiny raindrops on you. Only it wasn't raining. The damn worms were peeing on me. And if that's not bad enough, I would look down and see these little black round things all over, on my clothes, on my plate, in my hair, everywhere. It was raining worm shit too! I wonder how much worm feces I ate last night. I just don't want to think about it.

This is enough to confine me to my house until these bugs are gone. Only once they're gone the mosquitoes come. Thankfully mosquitoes don't like me that much and neither do they disgust me like the aforementioned.

I think something is wrong with me. It's not just a minor annoyance with these insects...I quite literally will just stay in my house to avoid them. Does anyone have any advice? Can anyone just make the bugs go away? Help me.

Good for a Laugh

"No other organism makes a showier display of its sex life than the angiosperm."

Thanks for the tip, Biology Textbook.

The Uphill Journey

Well, things are on the up and up, it seems. I still have a long way to go, but I also realize that this is a life-long journey that I am not expecting to perfect. However, I have made some progress out of the spiritual desert. And for that I am thankful.

It actually had a lot to do with the sermon I've been working on the last few weeks. I really don't enjoy preaching a whole lot. Actually, it's the writing that I don't like. I've always been good at it, but it just drains me and makes me act like I have adult ADD. I don't mind the speaking as much, although the nerves that happen right before are unpleasant. But once I get up there and start speaking I'm just fine. I'm also a good faker so people can't usually tell that I'm nervous. That's a blessing. The last thing I want is to make people feel anxious for me because I'm displaying anxiety. Have you ever felt that? You know the person up there is nervous or not comfortable, or they're really bombing up there and you get that yucky knot in your stomach too? I don't like doing that to people.

ANYways...long detour there. My church is doing a family series right now and I preached on family blessing, based on 2 Samuel 7 where king David tells God that he is going build him a temple and God says "no i'm going to build you a house" which was really a covenant he made with David ensuring the rule of his family forever, which came true with the birth of Jesus, the Eternal King. Talk about family blessing!

I then related this to how God is blessing our family as well...he has created His family and we are members in it. When we think of that stark grace that God is pouring out by establishing his covenant with us, it is overwhelming and we ask, just like David asked, "Why me? Who am I? What makes me so special that God would choose me?"

We are not perfect, but neither was David and God chose him. God chose us. Talk about family blessing.

If you want you will be able to listen to my sermon here. It's not posted up there yet, but keep checking...it should go up this week sometime. I wouldn't say that it's the best sermon I've written, but I would say that it is what God put on my heart to say. Maybe I say it's not my best sermon because I haven't heard a ton of feedback on it and I am insecure still in my preaching abilities and so I feel slightly nervous about how it's all perceived. All that aside, I do feel that this was the message God gave me to say last Sunday and that is all I could ever hope for.

So it was through writing and thinking about this that God drew me back to him. When I finally made the final connection in my brain (which eventually happens during the sermon-writing process) it really stopped me in my tracks. It just kept running over and over in my mind "God chose me. He chose me. He chose me." It was a wonderful realization. I'm not perfect and yet God chose me. And it made me excited about my faith again. That brings joy where before I felt empty.

Getting Back on the Horse

I do have an update regarding my previous post, but I'm preaching this Sunday and my follow-up is closely realted to what I will say in my sermon, so I'm going to hold off a few days until after I've preached it. That way those of you from here who read my blog can hear the sermon first. Call me anal. I don't care.

In other news, I went for my first run tonight in a long while. I have known that I need to get my arse off the couch, but knowing is different than doing. I lost 15 pounds in the first four months of this year. Some of it was the result of hard work at the gym, which was also driven by my post-breakup brush with anorexia (yes, I admit it, to those of you who suspected it, I'm sorry for lying, thanks for worrying about me). Don't worry, I was never truly committed to being anorexic, but I did flirt with the idea. And honestly, I just wasn't hungry and was actually mostly nauseous all day every day. Food really held no appeal. So I dropped 15 pounds. However I did it, it still happened.

And I felt great. I felt pretty. I felt hopeful.

Then I first injured my back and then sprained my ankle and my trips to the gym stopped very suddenly. Also, as my heart finally healed, I was no longer constantly nauseous (thank the Lord). Combine that with a trip to see my Grandma in Alberta where I had plenty of wonderful Mennonite meals and my stomach size has stretched right back out.

I feel yucky. I feel heavy. I feel discouraged.

I know that exercise makes me feel good about myself. I know to be healthy I need to drop a few more pounds, especially with the family genes I have inherited. But sometimes it's just so hard to get off the couch. And it's hard to say no to the second bowl of ice cream. But I must. For me, I must.

In other news, Happy Birthday to my adorable nephew Caleb, who is 2 today.